I am a late convert to the world of self-help books. I hated the idea of someone who didn’t even know me telling me how to live my life.
That teenage angst held on for a pretty long time.
When my therapist suggested I read one, I put it off. I didn’t want to do a self-help book. In fact, I was paying him to help me, why was he sending me to the self-help section?
But everything else he had asked me to do had made a pretty big difference, so I gave it a shot. He chose a fantastic book, and it really spoke to me on many levels. I decided to give self-help books a shot.
I have found a good amount of books that make sense to me. I have also read a good amount that should be thrown right into the trash. I haven’t figured out the secret to what the difference between the two is yet, but here is a list of ones that have really tickled my fancy.
Take them or leave them.
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As parents drop off their troubled kids at a reform camp, they then spend time learning skills from the camps directors. The book dives into the relationship we have with ourselves, and how our actions towards others determine our inner peace.
How many of the things we do are really essential? Our life is made up of things that are essential and things that are not. Some of the non-essential things are nice, but keep us from other things that are more important to us. By identifying the things that are essential, we can avoid unnecessary work and make more time for the things we truly care about.
Great things take time. Newport shares the experiences of some of our great creators, and how their creations didn’t happen overnight. He uses a three-part plan on how to slow down in a world that is living at break-neck speed. My favorite part of this one is how we should live in seasons.
I go back and forth about my feelings for the Covey empire, but there is no doubt that the 7 principles in this book are fantastic. Some of them will just reinforce the things you are already doing, while others will help you look at the world in a different way. Worth the read.
As an artists, I can’t miss adding in this book. It isn’t just for artists, though, it is for anyone who let’s their inside voice get in the way of truly succeeding. Pressfield is very succinct in his writing, and includes a game-plan for overcoming your insecurities and really putting yourself out there.
This is the edgiest book on the list, but Mark Manson has such a fun voice in his writing that I had to include it. This book flies in the face of positivity culture, showcasing the way that having a realistic understanding of how the world works can help you live your best life. Irreverent and relatable.
This is one of my all-time favorite books. I don’t usually think of it as self-help, but it appears on Amazon’s top 100 self-help book lists, so I decided to give it a space here as well. A young sheepherder follows his dream, finding a lot of stops along the way. A reminder to enjoy each part of the journey, and to not be in too much of a hurry to reach the end destination.
The final book in this list is about how our relationships and connections with people around us give us a better quality of life than we could have without them. It goes over when those relationships are hurt, and how to repair them, and how to nurture them to grow into something greater.
Brene Brown studies human behavior, and in this book she shares the power of being vulnerable. The heights we can reach when we allow ourselves to feel that vulnerability are greater than those when we keep stone-faced.
Jocko and Leif served on the same task force during the Iraq war. Task Unit Bruiser, their force, became the most decorated special operations unit in the war. These two navy seals share lessons about leadership and life supported by their personal war experiences in Iraq.
There are a lot of lessons in this book once you get past Sinek’s apple-fanboy writing. When we take the time to figure out why we are doing the things we want to do in our lives, determining the when and the how become a lot easier. His book Leaders Eat Last is also fantastic
This book is a homesteading book, but I also believe it has lessons for people with any desire in life. Slowing down and connecting with the world around us is a missing element in many of our lives that will really bring happiness. It also has an emphasis on community, and not just social media.
Anyone who has tried to quit a bad habit knows how difficult it can be, and how indulging in the bad habit can happen without even thinking about it. James Clear uses small changes in the way we think to change bad habits into good habits. This book can elevate you to the level you need to be at in order to reach the big goals you have.
The thoughts that you think will shape the things you do. This book is a look at how we can shape those thoughts in a way that will lead to you becoming who you really want to be. Allen uses a realistic approach, not telling you to not think certain things, instead he addresses how to handle unwanted thoughts.
Reality is that you will get into fights with others. This book discusses how to have those arguments in ways that do not hurt your relationship with the person you are arguing with, and goes over the basic rules of how to get results without the heartbreak. The Gottmans are both relationship researchers and psychiatrists.
And there it is, my top 15 list for the best self-help books. Are there any books that you would add to the list, or any books that have really connected with you that you would like to share?
Releasing the Notes 
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